Freaky fragment friday

I continue to hear gnashing of teeth over this whole Sweet Valley Size business, but a week later I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s nothing more than a bullshit Size 4 sack of stupid provocation, a crazy flack stunt to rid the Wakefield twins of their misty nostalgic associations and try to get them on the same bitchtastic bandwagon as the Gossip Girl and Clique books. And we all took the bait by blogging about it, hooray! Now let’s never buy these books again, and keep our fat fingers crossed that the reissues don’t sell, and subsequently the books get pulped to make recycled paper wrappers for delicious, delicious hamburgers enjoyed by future generations of pre-teen girls who will hopefully not run off and purge them in order to fit into a Size- Whatever-Is-Perfect- at-the- Moment. Agreed? Okay, then!

I’m doing one of those photo-a-day things at Flickr, wherein I try to take one half-decent photo a day, or at the very least POST one half-decent photo taken on another day when half-decent photo opportunities were more plentiful than they are on the particular day of posting. Yeah, hope that’s clear. Anyway, I’m trying to stay honest.

Oh, if you were wondering why you couldn’t get to Candyboots the last couple of days, I accidentally let the domain registration lapse. Oops, sorry. It’s back up! Sorry! Renewed all the way up to the End Times now, I swear.

The new BUST is on newsstands now, and if you buy it you can read my Pop Tart column on Britney Spears as well as a short interview I did with Ira Glass. I cannot quite bring myself to erase the recording of the original interview phone call, in which I laugh very loudly and horsily over every other thing Mr. Glass says. The gulf between the droll NPR radio career persona I often imagine for myself and the sad, sputtering reality is vast indeed, but oh well. As for the Britney piece, I wrote it when she was a bit more spinny-eyed than she is now, back when her future lifespan was looking as scanty as those shirt-dress-thingies she’d wear to the liquor store, and I figured I’d better write the column and gather her crazy roses while ye may, you know? But in a way I’m kind of glad that my article is a tad less relevant than it used to be. Perhaps you understand, too.


  1. jodi says

    I LOVED your Britney piece in BUST. And, I think we all understand and agree that it’s a good thing that it’s a tad less relevant than it used to be. Now let’s just hope that she’s somehow able to keep her shit together for more than a month or two.

  2. says

    You got to interview Ira Glass? It’s how Marcia’s friends must have felt when she got kissed by Davy Jones. Sigh. I’ll buy it today.

  3. Anna says

    Were I you, I’d NEVER erase the interview with Ira Glass. Holy smokes, I’m feeling the envy. You’re a rock star.

  4. says

    I just found your blog but I don’t know why I didn’t find it earlier since I have been reading BUST for years. The new issue is waiting for me at home right now. Which is actually annoying me at the moment since I want to read the pieces you mention here but I can’t because I’m not at home.

    Anyway, I found your blog through your book, which I’m reading right now. I love it so far and I can’t imagine my opinion will change at this point. I am resisting reading your Beyond the Book section until I’ve finished the book.

    I kind of feel like this should be an guestbook thing instead of a comment here, but I do have something to say about your actual post, which is that I completely agree with you that the stupid Size 4 thing was mostly publicity stunt. But I’m still glad you wrote about it because I found the commentary fascinating. And also I’m a little shocked that the SVH books came out in 1983 because I read them in the ’90s and totally had no idea that they weren’t brand new and totally current. Perhaps I wasn’t very observant.

  5. victoria says

    Oh dear. The New Yorker loved teh Gossip Girl books, so I started reading them, and now I’m hooked. But at least the GG books don’t mention specific weights and sizes to define “perfect” — tho they do suggest a woman’s appearance is the most important thing about her.

  6. kw says

    GoFugYourself just did a little synopsis of some of the attire changes made in the books. Gotta love those GFY ladies.

    And Jess, even in the 90’s there was still a lot of 80’s inspired fashion hanging around. I can’t believe that I dressed the way I did but when I look back I realize we were still trying to squirm our way out of the 80’s and into the next fashion era. Like the first sea/land creature crawling its way out of the primordial ooze.

  7. HP says

    De-lurking today just for the pleasure of you and your readers! I keep meaning to get a subscription to BUST and just never do it.

  8. says

    “I wrote it when she was a bit more spinny-eyed than she is now”

    I still have no clue how you are able to condense like twenty bazillion pounds of Brit dysfunction into one sentence that seems to sum it all up so casually and elegantly.

    You are mighty gifted, girl. Mighty gifted.

  9. says

    Ohh, Ira Glass, very cool….I never liked those Sweet Valley Ho’s…ugh, bad flashbacks to high school. I also love BUST! Been a loyal reader/lurker forever :)

  10. says

    First I’ve heard of BUST but am glad I found it – I do believe you’ve just gotten another subscriber! Enjoyed your post very much, too. Thanks and best of success!

  11. celia says

    Is Candyboots down again? Or is it the End of Times? I think I remember something about no access to Fluffy Mackerel Pudding being one of the signs of the Apocalypse.

  12. Wendy says

    Yes, it’s down, but why on earth are you using a comment on an 18-month old entry to ask me?