How much older the buildings are It’s not like I’ve never seen 19th century bricks or anything–we’re all very respectful of our older buildings and our architectural heritage and so on here in Chicago; we’re very rah-rah about our old shit. But the very old buildings in New York are grimly, compellingly old in a way that doesn’t make you think too much about history. Instead you sense that the people who built these places are just VERY DEAD NOW. Dead from very old diseases, like catarrh and marasmus and quinsy, and dead from being trod on by horses, too.
How many more goddamn people there are everywhere at every moment Is there a street festival somewhere? A parade? What? What are you all doing outside right now? It’s just Chinatown. Is it Buy A Knockoff Handbag Day? What?
Straws Wrapped soda straws were offered every single time I bought a can or bottle of Diet Coke in New York. Either the vendor/clerk/waiter would hand me a straw, which I would accept uneasily, as it is not part of my regular soda transaction, or else he or she would direct my attention to the straw dispenser, either by nudging it towards me or pointing at it as if to say “Straw? Take straw.” Is it so very Midwestern of me to not require this distance between my beverage and my mouth? Is it a bad thing in New York to take unmediated sips from bottles and cans? Explain the straws, please.