Four jobs Iâ€™ve had:
- Server at university student union coffee stand. Not a “barista.” Nobody called us that back then. No lattes, either, though sometimes people would come up and ask for one and we’d make fun of them after they left.
- Seasonal sales clerk at Marshall Field’s. When we’d have to leave the salesfloor to go to the bathroom, we had to say to our co-workers, “I’m going to Twenty-Six.” Except I don’t remember what the number was, but whatever the case, you’d say it in order to sound like you were going to some secret department to do fabulously expensive shoe inventory. And not just peeing.
- Essay test grader at ACT. Another seasonal job. It was a lot like this, actually.
- College creative writing instructor. I was twenty-three. My students were mostly twenty-one. You can imagine how this went. I made them read that Cynthia Ozick story about the shawl, the dead baby, and the Holocaust, and they made me read their stories about drunk driving tragedies, space zombies, and bestiality.
Four movies I can watch over and over:
- Bring It On, because this is not a democracy, it’s a cheerocracy.
- Singin’ in the Rain, which is not just a musical, it’s an amazing spectacular Hollywood circle-jerk of a movie.
- Fitzcarraldo, which I’ve only seen once, but come on! They drag a steamboat over a mountain! For real!
Four places Iâ€™ve lived:
- Oak Park, Illinois.
- A crumbling old house in Iowa City, Iowa.
- Another crumbling old house in Iowa City, Iowa.
- Chicago, Illinois.
Four TV shows
I love I’ve loved:
(What’s with the present tense here, silly meme?)
- That’s Incredible!
- St. Elsewhere
- Twin Peaks
- Cheers, the Shelley Long era
Four places Iâ€™ve vacationed:
- Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.
- Vancouver, Canada.
- Somewhere In Jamaica That Requried Us to Drive Two Hours From the Airport On The Wrong Side Of the Road Late At Night And We Almost Hit A Goat And I Cried In the Back Seat.
Four of my favorite dishes:
- Pad Kee Mao
- Macaroni and Cheese
- New York-style slices
- Feta and tomato omelets
Four sites I visit daily:
Four places I would rather be right now:
- Lake Michigan, because then I would be like, “Hey you! I’m a Great Lake! Splish splash, suckas!” and get to hang out with the U.P.
- Or I could be the Mall of America and be all, “Kiss my ass! I’ve got three roller coasters in my belly! A wedding chapel! An aquarium!”
- Ooh, what if I was Google? Does that count as a place? How would that work?
- Maybe I’m not understanding the question right.
I was tagged by Kevin. Blame him.