I believe it has been going on every morning here for at least the last two weeks: at some point around 11 am I’ll hear a short but jubilant burst of mechanical beeps coming from one corner of my office. It’s a little jingle sequence, really–the sort of deetleleety-deetle-deetle that you might hear from a digital watch alarm, or maybe the voice mail alert on older cell phones. I have no fucking idea what it is. I think it may be coming from somewhere in the pile of manuscripts I have in that corner–two or three file boxes of manila envelopes full of stuff I have to return.
I suppose it’s possible that a beeping thingy would have come with one of the manuscripts. People send us all kinds of things with their stories sometimes: stuffed animals, finger puppets, puzzle pieces, bits of felt shaped like dinosaurs, and once, an insect specimen. I’m having trouble imagining what kind of Beeping Thingy could have been sent to me, much less the kind of children’s story it would accompany, but I can’t rule it out. As far as I know, though, I’ve opened everything in that pile and wouldn’t I remember finding, you know, this Beeping Thingy?
I’ve ruled out everything else in the general vicinity of the beeping. No surge protectors; nothing electronic or battery-powered. Nothing, really, that could make a sound on its own, as most things in my office tend to be silent unless kicked or thrown against a wall. But every day the beeping continues, and every day I kind of forget I hear it.
And now that I’ve mentioned it, I bet it will stop.
No, really, what is it? Did I black out one day and buy a Tamagotchi? Is there some Children’s Book Unabomber who has it in for me? Is there a portal to another dimension? What?!
It’s definitely a portal. I mean, what else could it be?! When you find it, remember not to lick it.
it’s the new pearl vibrator/cell phone i bought you. it makes that sound when it’s on soft vibrate. you can also play simon with its red, yellow, blue, and green flashing lights.
I was going to say it was your vibrator reminding you it was time for ‘stress relief’. But Mykull. Damn.
So THAT’s where my mobile phone got to…
No, a portal would be nice. Although in my copious reading of SF I have yet to come across a beeping one. Let us know what the other dimension’s like when you get there.
How curious – I have a beeping thing that goes off every hour at 10 to the hour, and cannot for the life of me find where it’s coming from!
Yup, sounds like you’ve got an infestation of Slush-Sprites. I’ve heard that lighter fluid and a match are the most effective way of getting rid of them. On the other hand, the next JKR could be in the pile… Damn, that’s a tough one. I think when you do find it, the pieces that remain after you stomp on it a few times need to go back in the SASE.
My wife gave me a Radio Shack digital watch about a decade ago. It’s in a toolchest in my workshop, and over time it’s lost/gained about a half hour. It beeps on the ‘hour’, so if it’s quiet when I’m out there, I’ll suddenly hear it squeal. I’m wondering just how long the damn thing will run.
After your gadget has done its’ thing several thousand times, you’ll grow to love and cherish that little tinkle. Then one day …
I hope that, while the blog was down, you had time to find the source of the beeping. I’m dying of curiosity here! :o)
do you have an alarm system in there? when a sensor needs a new battery on my system it chirps like a bird…took me a while to figure it out….maybe?
DIANE SHIPLEY says
my old smoke alarm kept doing this, it took ages before i worked out what it was! We’d had a new one fitted ‘cos we couldn’t reach this old one to change the battery…not with my fear of heights…so it kept bleeping until I bashed it with the vacuum cleaner attachment. That taught it.
What a shame that the office’s portable X-ray machine is on the blink every time you need it. Frickin’ management.