Okay, so when I was in NYC Doug picked me up from the airport and gave me a ride back, so the very least I can do is vote for his band to win this big battle of the band thingy. If they win they’ll get a chance for a record contract with Epic, which is almost as cool as a free ride to LaGuardia, I think. Did you ever have anyone do something like that for you and you felt like you couldn’t thank them enough? Well, then you should vote for Doug’s band, too.
Also, to be fair, I listened to the other bands. The other bands sound like poo and their band names are tepid and silly. We don’t need any more groups using the Adjectivenoun Smooshedtogether formula, or calling themselves American Vaguely High-Concept Something-Or-Other, or being all serious and going by a name that sounds like a book about recovery. (I don’t know what to say about the extremely meek-sounding solo artist stage name. The only thing really going for it is that it doesn’t end with “Imbruglia.”) Anyway: they’re pure ass, those other bands. They’re mouth-breathers who don’t have it in them to do brilliant songs like this in their spare time.
Also? I feel bad for when Doug parked his car by Central Park so we could visit the Met, and I thought he checked the meter so I didn’t ask if he’d paid it, even though I’m usually really compulsive about that thing, and it turned out he didn’t check the meter and he got a BIG TICKET. You know how that happens sometimes with people you know and their cars? And you’re like, “God, sorry, man,” and they’re all “that’s okay, it’s not your fault,” and you know that of course it’s not your fault at all but you still feel an icy little pit of helpless regret deep inside? VOTE FOR DOUG’S BAND AND THAT FEELING WILL GO AWAY FOREVER.