for anyone who has ever wanted to start an online journal but has little nagging questions about what kind of stuff is appropriate to write. Are you worried you’re going to write something online that you’ll regret later? Or, worse, that you’ll post some “deliciously naughty” little anecdote about your own perky tits only to discover that oh my God some creep did a majorly pervo Google search and is reading your site eeeeeuuuwwwwww. That really is unfortunate. So when you’re struck with the impulse to tell everyone about your new vibrator, try this test:
Imagine you are riding public transportation. Let’s say it’s a bus. It’s near rush hour and the bus is crowded but not packed. You have several stops to go before you get off. At the next stop a crazy person gets on. He or she may be carrying an old vacuum cleaner hose or a plastic bag full of crumpled phone book pages or a filthy doll wrapped in toilet paper to clearly indicate his or her crazy status. Everyone tries to ignore the crazy person as he or she stomps up and down the aisle, muttering to him or herself. Suddenly, Crazy Person stops and screams, “YOU!” Everyone looks up. The crazy is pointing directly at you. Everyone is turned around in their seats and staring. They can see the crazy person is looking you right in the eye. It’s as if Crazy can suddenly see into your soul. Crazy squares his or her shoulders and takes a deep breath and is about to shout; Crazy has something to say to everyone, and it’s the very thing you were just thinking about putting online.
So do you really want it to be about what you did with your Kegel muscles the other night? Are you okay with that? Are you? Good.